Staring at the Sun

I did not go outside at all today. This is a big thing when you live in a basement apartment. There are times when I have gone 2 maybe 3 days without leaving the house. When I finally do I find myself having to cover my eyes with my hand from the blinding sun. I feel like a child emerging from plato’s cave.

But in the darkness, in a room which the sunlight can never breach, I managed to study. So the whole day didn’t feel like a complete loss. University finals are the toughest and it has nothing to do with the material or syllabus. The hardest thing is the promise of summer; the promise of Jordan; the promise of home. It’s absolutely impossible to concentrate on a political comparison between NAFTA and EU economic paradigms in free trade when Jordan feels closer every day. A few weeks ago I made a list of 50 things I’d like to do there and reading it now it’s so vague, my mind is currently operating on a much more detailed level. Between the chapter on US relations post-911 and Structures from Keynes to Neo-lib, I found myself making up mp3 playlists to play in the car when I get home. I was mentally rearranging tracks trying to remember which song should lead into what song. By the time I got to “1980’s pop-hits” I decided to take a break. So I watched a re-run of Monk. If you ever think you’re going insane, watch Monk and you’ll feel better about yourself…

Conceptual Question of the Moment: Is procrastination a disease?

What I learned today: Thomas Hobbes and John Locke were the ugliest political philosophers ever.

Quote of the Moment: “Cheerleaders are dancers who have gone retarded” – Bring it On

Song Playing as I Study: “Pictures of You” – The Cure

Lyrics I remembered upon writing this post:

“I did not go outside yesterday
Don’t wake me… Please don’t wake me
‘Cause I was dreaming, And I might just stay inside again today.
I don’t go out much these days
Yes sometimes I stay inside all day”

– Miller’s Angels, Counting Crows

Posted In: Rants